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2018-03-12 - 2:07 a.m.

I've departed way too far away from the roots of what had made me feel alive and beautiful... mainly because i look to move away from the past and never look back...

tonight i go back.. listening to the beautiful music i thought about constantly for my early guitar years... my growing emotional years...

such simplicity in the songwriting and melodies, yet trying to be bigger than what it is... that is what my youth was.. and i hear it.. and tonight it affects me deeply...

it makes me want to get up and do it again.. work and live and feel like im doing what i want.. playing by my rules and making my own way... like i have a secret and i just need to show it.. is that what youth really is? is the feeling of age a lost of hope? a failing in my self esteem?

now it fell far enough for me to recognize and remember it.. i will brainwash myself with it's sounds and not think so academically about it.. i will reimprint the feeling and move from there, once again


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